What Lies Beyond the Eyes

I am worried about today honestly. I ran out of my anxiety pills yesterday, and my mom hasn gone and renewed the prescription yet. I want to make this day fun for everyone, but I know Im probably going to be freaking out the whole day because of all the people and chaos at the waterpark. I will try my best though.

It was a warm summer morning on the weekend when my little brother, Danny, and I climbed in the car to go to the waterpark. One more week, not including this weekend, before I start college, and I can feel the pressure mounting on me. Apparently, mom could tell, which is why she basically forced me to take Danny on this outing, so I can loosen up.

My head is killing me, but I need to look on the bright side. Apparently, Gias older stepsister is taking them to the waterpark, so I don have to take her and Romantica to the waterpark too and deal with Gias constant flirting and chatting with Danny all the way over there. Gia is Dannys girlfriend, and Rom is her best friend. Danny is more of a ladys man than I was. His trendy hairstyle with highlights along with his more muscular build lent him to that while I had dark brown (almost black) curly hair with a slim build to contrast him. He looked to be straight out of a comic book while I was a side character that was into running and track. His bright blue wide eyes were a stark contrast to my dark brown eyes and half-asleep eyelids.

His girlfriend directly complimented his own nature with long, bright, blonde hair to go with her beaming personality. Her bright blue eyes were the sky to her hairs sun. Definitely not my type, but hes the one dating her not me.

Mom packed us some snacks and first aid for the trip, and we made our way along the thirty-minute trip to the park. When we finally got there, Gia and Rom were already inside the park, and Danny was in a hurry to get to them.

When we got inside, we could see the whole park. There were resting areas right in front of the entrance where Gia and Rom were, and the slides were right in front of that. There was a lazy river to the left, and a kid area to the right. There were four slides total with various degrees of height that looked menacingly down onto me. ”Ill probably stay on the lazy river and relax the whole day to be honest. ” I thought to myself, quickly going to drop the stuff off at the resting area the two girls were at.

They were alone with a white bag in a chair next to them. Gia ran up and hugged Danny and told him, ”I missed you sooooo much. Come on we have to hurry and go! Sandy already has a head start on us on the slides! ”

”If you were so excited to go on the slides, why haven you already gone up yet? ” I mumbled to myself, admittedly already annoyed and short because of my headache.

Gia, however, heard my comment, and instead of getting annoyed, she instead used it to her advantage. ”Becausssseee, I wanted to wait for Dannyyy! ” She gleefully responded while grabbing onto him.

I almost threw up in my mouth, but I should have seen it coming. I walked right into that one. I glanced over at Gias silent friend standing expectantly beside her, ”And you waited because you didn want to be alone without Gia? ” I tiredly asked her.

She gave a cute little nod and a pleasant smile as if to say, ”thank you for your understanding. ”

I felt bad for her. It had to be extremely tiring to keep up with Gia all day, but from what Ive seen she doesn really mind it. She just follows along quietly behind her, being swept up in the whirlwind that is her friend.

Gia started to drag Danny towards the slides before I told them, ”Hold up Danny. Put some sunblock on first. ”

”Mark! What are you a mom? ” Gia spit at me in a disgusted tone. God, her voice is ear piercingly high. Its like she tries to sound annoying and tries to give me a headache.

I fired back as I leaned toward her while handing the sunblock to Danny, ”No, but my mom would get pissed off if her son came back looking like a tomato, and I would get the blame. ”

Now it was Dannys turn to use something I did to his advantage, and calmed his girlfriend down by applying some sunscreen on her nose saying, ”Did you put on sunscreen? ”

Gia began stuttering from the sudden attack. ”God, I hate this! ” I exclaimed in anguish in my head.

As soon as Danny finished putting the sunblock on, Gia immediately dragged him off to the slides again. He dropped the sunblock from the sudden jerk, and I lazily picked it up and put it in the bag.

Gia was wearing your standard bikini, it had purple and pink stripes with pink frill, Danny probably loved it. I went over to the table, and while I sat down the bags we brought, I asked Rom, ”You aren going with them on the slides? ”

She leaned her head on her knee that was up on her chair as she looked at me, and she told me in her quiet voice, ”I think it would just be awkward for me again. ”

Rom was a quiet girl with raven black hair. Her height matched Gias which came up to my chest, so about 53 ”. I still don know how she got to be best friends with that blonde demon. I hear that Rom is a pretty popular girl in school despite her introverted nature though. Her picturesque beauty probably has a lot to do with that. She had a short-sleeved, light-pink jacket over the top of her swimsuit that covered the upper half of her body and also acted like a skirt.

Thinking about her situation with my brother and his girlfriend, I started to sympathize with her. Memories started to flood into my mind about how I was always left out in group trips. Everyone else had a relationship but not I. I coped with it by telling myself, ”I just rather focus on school. ” No matter what I told myself though, it didn change the fact that I felt completely alone. It also didn stop my attempts to have one… I still have nightmares about it. I had no lasting friendships, and I had no one that I could really talk to about my feelings. I guess thats why I developed depression and anxiety. I want to be accepted so badly, but I always seem to fall short.

I hate it.

Jolting myself back to reality, I gazed upon Rom. She looked just like I did when I was her age, awkward and alone. Her crystal blue eyes seemed to have a mask over them. When I looked at them, it was like I was looking through a time capsule to myself when I was a freshman. Its probably going to be awkward for her if she went alone up the slides, so I mustered up some will power and offered to her, ”Want me to go with you for the first couple of times then? I can handle the higher slides though. ”

Her head jolted up from her knee as her face brightened up, and she quickly nodded her head. I guess she really didn want to be left alone after all.

She took off her light-pink jacket and started to run to the slides before turning around to wait for me. I took off my sandals and followed her on the searing cement. She wore a bikini that was almost a pink one-piece with light blue frill on the top. It brought me back to a time last summer Gia went shopping with us, and I could swear that she wanted to get that one. When she tried it on however, both my mom and Danny liked another one better. I didn pay that much attention to it, but I could swear that was the one.

I smirked to myself thinking about the fact that Gia didn get the one she wanted, and it instead went to her best friend by popular vote. Wanting to poke fun at Gia even though she isn her, When I finally caught up to Rom, I told her in a casual tone, ”Looks cute. ”

I wonder if Gia remembered that time? I could hold this over her head when she gets annoying again. I looked to my side to see that Rom had her head down and was walking a little slower. Is she upset? The realization then hit me like a truck. I called a freshman cute when Im going into my first year in college. I was too caught up in savoring the small victory to realize that was a weird thing to say if interpreted differently.

”Uh…Umm. Sorry about that. I didn mean it like that. ”

”This is why I don have a girlfriend. ” I thought to myself. I can read social situations very well.

I put my head down and started walking faster to the slides out of embarrassment, but I felt a sudden tug on my arm before I could create some distance. I stopped and heard Rom say in her small, quiet voice, ”Thanks. ”

I looked back to see her looking down, and her shoulders and part of her face was red. I thought to myself, ”Did I really make her that uncomfortable, and did she put on sunblock? Her pale skin is already getting sunburnt. ”

”Lets hurry to the slides before the line gets too long. ” I told her as we sped up our pace to the slides.