Rise

opped joking around.
Even when they were all practicing at the NetCow Cafe after school, Lin Feng was disconnected from everything.
He didn’t say much of anything when he was coaching them either.
He just stood there, quietly watching.
Gone was the constant pointing out of their mistakes, the yelling, the badgering that pushed them to their limits.
It was replaced by a quiet and uneasy tension, and a withdrawn Lin Feng.

That’s when they realized that something was wrong with Lin Feng.
Something far more than just the loss at Worlds.
They were worried about him, but there was also nothing they could do.
Every time they tried to ask him what was wrong, tried to even approach the subject, he’d force out a smile and shake his head.
Let them know everything was fine in that quiet way that made them all the more worried and walk away.

✹

After school, the club members gathered for a secret meeting.
The subject was obviously Lin Feng and what was going on with him. 

“Dudes and Dudettes, I know that he’s not fine.
Especially because he’s saying that he’s fine.
You know what it is? Listen, you know when you’re with a shorty and she tells you everything is okay when its not? Its that kind of fine.
As the resident playa here, I can tell you for sure that the more he says everything’s fine, the more everything is obviously not fine!” Ouyang fumed.

“He really does seem off lately.
I really wonder what’s going on with him.
But if he doesn’t tell us, there’s nothing we can do to help him,” Ren Rou said with a look of concern.

Chen Ze and Wei Dong nodded.

Yang Fan turned to Tang Bingyao.
“Tang Tang, out of everyone here right now, I think it ’s fair to say that you’ve had the longest connection with Lin Feng and know him the best.
Do you know what’s going on with him?”

Ouyang protested, “Hold it right there! You saying Tang Tang knows Bro Feng better than me? Do you really think anyone knows a bro better than his bro?” 

Yang Fang looked at Ouyang seriously and said, “Ouyang.
Not the time.
Tang Tang, you tell us what’s going on.” 

Tang Bingyao shook her head.
“I don’t know either.” Then she looked down at the ground.
The truth was that she was just as worried about Lin Feng as everyone else.
She racked her brains to figure out what was going on with him and what was causing this strange mood.
She thought she had a good idea.
Or at least a lead.
She knew that Lin Feng was a good friend of KG’s top laner, God Roundy.
So that probably had something to do with why Lin Feng was so preoccupied these days.
But there was something more to it, something that she didn’t understand.
That was why she couldn’t figure out exactly what Lin Feng was going through in his feelings. Besides, she wasn’t very good at comforting people and that was just as frustrating right now.
She tried to talk to Lin Feng about what he was going through a couple times now, but she always ended up backing away in the end.
She just didn’t know how to comfort him.
Or where to start comforting him.
The whole thing was frustrating!

✹

That night, after practice ended, everyone on High School 13’s team said bye to each other and went their separate ways.

Lin Feng and Tang Bingyao walked home together, as usual.
It was a calm and peaceful night.
Not that many people were walking around, and the streetlights gave the sidewalk a warm yellow glow.
Lin Feng walked mechanically with his eyes looking down at the ground.
Not saying a word.
the ground, not saying a word.
Tang Bingyao walked in front of him, making sure not to step on any cracks in the sidewalk and occasionally hopping forward if there were too many.
But she didn’t try to get Lin Feng to talk, nor did she say anything.
But every once in a while, she’d stop and glance back at him just to make sure he was still behind her and okay.
Then she’d continue walking.
 The pair walked on like this in silence for a block.
Until Lin Feng finally broke the silence with a question, “Hey, why do you keep looking back at me?”

“I was worried you’d hit your head on a pole.
You’ve been walking with your head down this whole time,” Tang Bingyao replied while tilting her head in that adorable way girls do.
She looked Lin Feng in the eyes. It’s now or never, Tang Tang! Ling Feng had broken the silence between them, she had to go for it and figure out what was bothering him. Now’s probably the best time. So she asked, “Are you okay?”

Lin Feng forced a smile and said, “Oh, I’m fine!” 

Tang Bingyao stared at Lin Feng’s face, “That smile looks super fake.”

Lin Feng’s eyes widened and the smile faltered.
Then the mask broke and he looked sad and a little embarrassed.
He rubbed his face with both hands before saying, “Really? No way, right…?”

Tang Bingyao didn’t respond.
She kept looking at Lin Feng.

Lin Feng started feeling awkward and scratched his head.
“R-really.
There’s nothing to worry about.
I’m fine.”

Tang Bingyao slowly nodded her head, then she asked, “Is it because KG lost?”

The question hit Lin Feng harder than he was expecting.
He thought someone would eventually ask and he was prepared.
But it still phased him enough to let more emotion slip through onto his face.
Then he recovered and smiled.
But one that had very little joy or warmth behind it.
Then he replied, “I guess.
A little bit.
But that’s not all of it.”

Tang Bingyao scrunched up her nose and frowned.
“I don’t understand.”

Lin Feng chuckled.
“Ah, it’s fine.
You don’t have to.” He then paused and looked up.
It was clear in Shanghai tonight.
There were no stars.
Only the moon shining brightly overhead, shrouding the entire city in a veil of silver light.
He stared at the night sky, calmly, and then suddenly asked, “Hey, don’t you think I’m really useless?”

“Huh?” Tang Bingyao remarked in surprise.
The stunned look on her face was cute.

Lin Feng waved his hand and shook his head.
“It’s nothing.
I was just talking to myself.
Come on, let’s go.
We’re almost at your house.”

✹

After arriving back home, Lin Feng smelled something delicious the moment he stepped through the door.
The dining room table was already set with a variety of dishes. 

Su Xue came walking out the kitchen with an apron on, carrying a plate full of stir fried eggplants.
When she saw Lin Feng was back, she smiled at him and greeted, “You’re home! Come come! Wash your hands and let’s eat dinner!”

High School 13’s team members weren’t the only ones to notice Lin Feng’s peculiar mood over last few days.
Su Xue was actually the first one that noticed something was off.
How could she not? They basically spent every day together! She was also worried.
But she had a secret weapon that none of the others did.
She could cheer him up with food! That’s why she spent the day cooking so many of the things he liked to eat.
But she  didn’t know what was going on with him either.

At the dinner table, Su Xue watched Lin Feng eating with his head buried in the rice bowl.
She couldn’t hold herself back any longer and gently asked, “Hey, what’s going on? Is practice with the team not going well?”

Lin Feng shook his head.

Su Xue racked her brains.
Then she made a wild guess and asked, “Did something happen between you and Tang Tang?” Thinking she might have hit the nail on the head, she started giving some meaningful advice.
“You guys are still young.
Getting into a fight or two is no big deal.
But you’re the guy, so you should just let her have her way sometimes…” The more she spoke, the more she was convinced she was right.

Lin Feng flat-out denied her guess, “No, it’s not that! I think your imagination is starting to run a little too wild! Me and Tang Tang, we’re fine! Our relationship isn’t like that! We’re Master and Disciple!”

Su Xue was stumped quiet.
Then she asked, “Then… then, what’s going on with you?”

Lin Feng was about to open his mouth, but then he changed his mind and shook his head.
“It’s fine.
Don’t worry about me.”

“Ahem.
Then, what about your midnight snack? Do you want a chicken cutlet? I can order you some,” Su Xue said.

“We’re still eating dinner.
It’s way too early for that,” Lin Feng said quietly and curtly.

“Oh, right.” Su Xue said.

It was the first time Su Xue had seen Lin Feng be anything other than the happy, cheerful, oblivious kid that he was.
The first time he’d been so curt and dismissive towards her.
She didn’t know what to say.
She was confused, worried, and more than a little hurt that Lin Feng wouldn’t let her in.
Wouldn’t let her help him.
So she stayed quiet. They finished the rest of the meal in silence and went back to their respective rooms.